[FM] 39 - Jealousy
Sep. 18th, 2006 09:28 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
asinglewordwilldoI think we’re all subject to jealousy at one point or another...professional jealousy, the jealousy tied to love and friendship, even the petty jealousy that finds its most banal roots in material and spiritual envy. It’s a quality of being human...and I confess, I’m not above it.
Most recently, I’ve found jealousy of another kind...one that, I must admit, I don’t regret feeling. It started when I met the daughter of the woman I’ve been visiting during my recent stays in Connecticut. Her name is Rory, and she’s quite a remarkable girl...brilliant mind, shame it was wasted on Yale.I’m kidding, girls. And yet with all her thirst for knowledge, for all her scholarly inclinations...she’s every bit her mother’s daughter. She’s a little flighty and high strung, has a rather unconventional sense of humor, and little regard for public opinion...not to mention a ghastly and eternal hunger for and an inhuman ability to metabolize all things sweet, fatty, and otherwise bad for you.
And when I see Rory and Lorelai together...I do confess to a pang of jealousy, however brief.
Rory is a very fortunate young lady, and she seems very aware of that fact...seeing the relationship she has with her mother makes me wonder on my own life...what could have been, what I might have had, if only I’d found the right person sooner. It makes me wonder if, under different circumstances, I might have been lucky enough to have someone like Rory in my own life.
[locked from Sodalitas Quaerito]
Along with my personal problems, I deal with jealousy of another sort...or at least I did.
Paul and Evelyn...their convictions, their beliefs, or even their lack thereof. They know what they lack or what they don’t...even in their uncertainty, they are sure.
My beliefs have never been so concrete...only my pursuit of them.
Even now that I have something more to believe in in my life...a woman I could have a future with, I find that my beliefs come even further into question. I know what I am willing to do for what I know to be true, but in matters of faith...what the heart knows over the head...
I am not jealous of Paul for his experiences, nor am I jealous of Evelyn for her brush with death.
In the end? It is their beliefs which I fear will forever be a source of envy for me.
[/locked]
Muse: Alva Keel
Fandom: Miracles
Words: 417
Most recently, I’ve found jealousy of another kind...one that, I must admit, I don’t regret feeling. It started when I met the daughter of the woman I’ve been visiting during my recent stays in Connecticut. Her name is Rory, and she’s quite a remarkable girl...brilliant mind, shame it was wasted on Yale.
And when I see Rory and Lorelai together...I do confess to a pang of jealousy, however brief.
Rory is a very fortunate young lady, and she seems very aware of that fact...seeing the relationship she has with her mother makes me wonder on my own life...what could have been, what I might have had, if only I’d found the right person sooner. It makes me wonder if, under different circumstances, I might have been lucky enough to have someone like Rory in my own life.
[locked from Sodalitas Quaerito]
Along with my personal problems, I deal with jealousy of another sort...or at least I did.
Paul and Evelyn...their convictions, their beliefs, or even their lack thereof. They know what they lack or what they don’t...even in their uncertainty, they are sure.
My beliefs have never been so concrete...only my pursuit of them.
Even now that I have something more to believe in in my life...a woman I could have a future with, I find that my beliefs come even further into question. I know what I am willing to do for what I know to be true, but in matters of faith...what the heart knows over the head...
I am not jealous of Paul for his experiences, nor am I jealous of Evelyn for her brush with death.
In the end? It is their beliefs which I fear will forever be a source of envy for me.
[/locked]
Muse: Alva Keel
Fandom: Miracles
Words: 417
